GLOBADOM

Mike was successfully married. My motorcycle was not successfully sold. The Dodge Viper is a powerfully fast vehicle.

Oh, the before picture of Mike is pretty funny, too: but as you see above, he looks pretty good in rented clothes.

The wedding went as smoothly as any I have ever been involved with. The transportation showed up on time, the chaplain was appropriately light and grave in equal parts, the venue was beautiful, and the catering surpassed expectations. No alcohol-inspired guest breakdowns, and the photo session and speeches were completed with pace, neither too hasty nor the usual dreadful slog. And the funny song was extremely funny!

A word of warning to the unaware: The wedding party photo is linked to a larger version of itself, but that is very large; probably 800k or so. Mom, Dad, your dial-up link won’t be able to take it!

Joe’s new Audi A4 1.8T, which is not pictured here, is a model of mid-sized Teutonic gravitas, and is beautiful charcoal inside and out. I think Joe chose the car as an extension of his own persona, in which he now, possibly for the first time in his life, wants to be seen as a serious person doing serious things.

For most people, a car is a ludicrous thing in which to “invest” money. I live this philosophy by driving a functional but unprepossessing 10-year-old Tercel. But Joe’s business involves selling himself to others (in the good way, not the bad way), and being able to project a certain gravitas will help. Plus, he can write the car off against his taxes, so yay leasing!

It already seems to be paying dividends. The cute bridesmaid strolled out during the party, looked over Joe’s car, and asked, “is this your penis extension?”

But just before asking for a ride in the car, she added “it’s a nice penis.” Referring of course, to Joe’s. Car. Joe’s car.