Okay, this site will soon be…something else, most likely. The important thing is that what you need to do right now is start reading wiredcola.com, the world’s only Cybermorphic weblog, and the true home of Ryan Cousineau’s delusional, self-aggrandizing writing. If you look carefully, you will see that the new Wired Cola now includes all of the posts that you see here, which is to say, all of the posts from the old blogger-based site, too. Pretty cool, huh? So now, it’s off to Wired Cola, which is also to be the true, canonical location of the still-being-updated Test The Nation: Blogger Scorecard.

It’s all true. Done in by my love of stinky brie.Let’s leave off the part where I lost my wallet there (boring) and the various rather poor choices I made in trying to retrieve it (boring and dumb), and the curious punctuality of the cheese shop (they really do close at 7!) The fun really begins when you are getting on a plane with no checked luggage, no  carry-on, and no ID…

Like go to the Hockey Hall of Fame.

Hockey Hall of Fame pano

It’s pretty much the most astoundingly beautiful sports museum imaginable.

Stained Glass Dome in HHOF

Whups. Just to make things complicated, I’ve moved this post over to its permanent home at Wired Cola.

Everything is preserved there, and all the latest scores are available, so please go now.

If you can read this, then Test the Nation has finished airing on the west coast.

I didn’t win.

But I had fun, and I was on the winning team, and the winner was on our team, and hey, trip to Toronto!

Your winner, Rick Spence:

Photo by Rannie Turingan.

Some brief show notes:

I think the producers were frankly shocked the winning score was as high as 57, and that the average score of the winning team was so high (50, I think). I don’t have my score yet, but I rough estimate is low 50s. Above average in the group, but not as high as I hoped.

The bloggers group was loose, having a lot of fun (we routinely cat-called and taunted the celebrities and backpackers) and were probably too loud in the studio (the crew wanted us to make some noise, and we obliged with undying love for Samantha Bee). I think this was partly borne from the sense (early on) that we were the favorites and not by a little, and partly because we’re all naturally opinionated and outspoken. I’m not sure the crew were expecting such a perky group.

It wasn’t clear in the studio (chefs sat farthest from us), but my wife says Bob Blumer seemed really peeved by their “vegetarian” gaffe on the show. Which is a fairly massive boner if you’ve done even a little bit of pre-show research on your featured guests. The bit where the Bloggers momentarily booed our (leading) selves was a funny miscue. They had the host standing by the taxi drivers, and trying a deceptive reveal, which backfired because when he said “taxi drivers,” they started cheering, drowning out his “sit down,” which left them cheering, and most of the bloggers booing. I figured out what was going on fairly quickly (amusingly, because I arrogantly assumed there was no way the taxi drivers could be leading), but by then everything was confusion. That’s live TV!

Ms. Bee (who I have to confess, I have never heard of before) was a very generous celebrity guest, staying and meeting with numerous bloggers after the show, despite already experiencing disturbing outpourings of love from our direction during the show. Tricia Helfer wisely bailed as soon as the lights went up and was never seen again. I believe that had she not, the combination of Battlestar-driven nerd-lust and CBC-grade security may have led to a riot. I won’t name the blogger who quietly said (as she came close to our section) “I’ve seen you naked….”

Having piled us into the studio after three hours of (catered) waiting in a huge (studio-sized) holding room, they rolled us into the studio, did some rehearsals, and, well, we spent nearly three hours in the seats without being able to leave, so some people were pretty thirsty. After the show started, the celebs appeared on stage, and during the breaks, they got water! We did not. The bloggers started pleading (all during the breaks) with anyone within earshot to let us have some water. This was more in jest than in seriousness (Samantha Bee’s efforts to get the crew to take pity on us were in vain), but then even the PAs got some water on their breaks!

Every description of the nerve centre was so hokey that when the bloggers weren’t rolling their eyes, they were outright laughing. There’s some fairly nifty clicker technology involved (I’m not going to laugh at any system that can instantly tally 180 answer clickers), but the big computer was probably either that laptop on TV or a fairly lightweight server.

The odd groups made for a pretty good pre-show mixer. I have to admit that there was definite cliquishness (the white-jacketed chefs all in one corner, the cab drivers having fun at their tables), the draw of the celebrity look-alikes and air crews led to a regular stream of traffic circulating through those two areas. You could routinely enjoy the sight of wannabe-paparazzi photographic fake celebrities in the break room.

It was fun. Did I say that already, because it was.

I am a winner!

I’m actually posting this before the show stops airing on the West Coast, so I am beholden not to reveal any results.But I had a lot of fun doing it. I’ll follow-up with a results post, too, and I’m going to see if I can get the bloggers to disclose their scores, so I can do a post with all the numbers. We didn’t get our individual scores (except for the overall winner) in studio, so we’ll see them soon, an individually.And now, photos:Blumer, Cousineau, OlsonAir CrewCelebrity Look-Alike seating chartGiovanni Ribisi has a look-alike? Much more in  my photostream, and that of others.

I’ll be an in-studio participant on the CBC game show Test the Nation, as part of the bloggers team. You’ll be able to mock my performance for the comfort of your own home Sunday night at 8 pm.  

The ridiculous title explained: Ms. Helfer is one of the celebrity guests who will be on the show. So now you have a reason to watch!

 Regarding the site, it’s still in a state of flux. I hope to work on stability this weekend. 

A few years ago Wired Cola was acquired by Globadom LLC, a closely-held venture with a simple but daring business plan.

Wired Cola will continue normal operations at wiredcola.com. As you can see, the transition has begun, though it is not complete. We expect great things to happen.

We appreciate the continued support of you, all 20 of our beloved clients, and promise to continue to be the same lovable, Cybermorphicâ„¢ corporation you already love to Cybermorphâ„¢ with.

Oh, and please buy our stuff.

Thank you,
Ryan Cousineau
VP Marketing, Wired Cola
Chief Cybermorphic Officer (CCO), Globadom LLC

We bring you synergy.

I warned all 20 of you last year that big changes might be coming.

They are.

First manifestation: visiting wiredcola.com in the next day or two may be messy. On the other hand, it is about to be the proper repository of Wired Cola, the world’s only Cybermorphic beverage/weblog/synergy leverage project, and a division of Globadom, Incorporated.

Look for exciting Web 1.4-type features coming soon, as we exit the blogspot ghetto.

You know why I did this? Because I have a 50% failure rate on typing blogspot’s captchas.

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