GLOBADOM

I’m tired now, but I just had one of my best races ever. Won a prime sprint for a swanky watch, and was dangerously close to taking a podium spot. Some entertaining numbers: I saw a peak heart rate of 203 bpm, which is, frankly, something close to inhuman, but was consistent with the other readings I got. My max speed was over 60 km/h, and that on a dead-flat course.

I think this means I have the hang of Thursdays.

There’s gonna be a picture-dump soon.

As part of the new SeaVancouver festival (“it’s Sea-Fest without the drunken rioting!”), the Tall Ships have returned.

What more need be said? You either like big wooden sailboats, or you don’t. I do. Actually, the whole SeaVancouver festival seems interesting, and runs July 6-10 in and around False Creek, Kits beach, et cetera.

Back to the tall ships specifically: the vessels arrive in English Bay between 12:30 and 3:30 on Thursday, July 7. If I read the website correctly, the ships will mostly be docked to a temporary mid-bay moorage they’re calling Tall Ship Island, which sounds kind of neat. I’m thinking it will be like the village in Waterworld, only good.

Pricing: Note that SeaVancouver will sell you a $15, all-days General Admission wristband, but this won’t actually get you onto Tall Ship Island or get you boarding privileges. For that you need the Tall Ship Wristband, which is $20 for one day, or $30 for all days. General admission to the rest of SeaVan is included in that price. Senior/student discount pricing may or may not be still available; it’s listed as an “early bird” option.

It was pointed out to me that certain fans of mine who came out to watch me race last week didn’t know what I look like on the bike.

This is understandable: 60 riders, 40 km/h, and picking out a face is going to be hard.

So here it is. On the bike, I look like this. I’m in the red and white Escape Velocity uniform

The key things to notice in that shot are my gangster colours, which are a constant. The other thing that makes me easy to pick out is that I’m one of the smaller, rounder riders. The distinctive white frame of my bicycle, The Whip, should make for clear identification, too. The helmet, alas, could be either black (shown) or red, depending on which one I pull off the wall.

As for when to see me next, well, that’s tricky. The next major event I’m likely to contest is the BC Criterium Championships on August 14. I’m sure you all want to get up for a bike race that starts in North Van at 8:45 on a Sunday morning. Anyone? Anyone?

More sensibly, I’ll be doing most of the Tuesday nighters at UBC, and hope to do more of the Thursday nighters in Richmond. Those races run weekly, weather permitting, until the end of August.

Cat Agility Contests. You know, like Superdogs, except for cats.

The photos and story from their first training event are not to be missed.

Well, I’m pretty sure it’s not a hoax…

First things last: Supafamous is all over Kobayashi’s repeat at the hot dog eating contest. No record this year, but still utterly dominant.

And now, “The Good Thing” explained. A surprising number of you took a guess, but nobody came close. Jak gets bonus points for referencing the VW Thing, a possibility which he argued coherently for. But no.

The Lovely One and I are familiar with the reference from the obscure 60s film If It’s Tuesday, This Must Be Belgium. But the joke surely originated somewhere other than that movie.

During one sequence, the characters visit London’s SoHo district, at that time the swinginest place on the planet. As they go clothes shopping, there are a series of quick cuts to what are presumably t-shirt slogans. One is What about the good things Hitler did?

So for the Beetle-Hitler connection, you have to know that the orginal Volkswagen (“people’s car”) was designed by Dr. Ferdinand Porsche (yes, same Porsche), but was championed by Hitler (that article is a pretty good history of the Beetle) as a car for the masses.

But then, while researching the Beetle’s origins, I came up with this story of the Englishman (!) who actually started the Volkswagen’s production.

But I’ll give you a ridiculous bald-faced assertion. Hitler’s…legacy…can probably be summed up 50 years after WWII as the creation of four substantial and lasting things. The EU and the UN, both designed to stop future Hitlers, and so far, so-so, with some qualifiers and doubts about the future, are two of them. The other two were probably the VW Beetle and the Autobahn system.

The Autobahn still works, and is still a benchmark for world freeway systems. I like cars, so there will be no big rant following that statement.

The VW Beetle was one of the most successful and prolific cars ever. It virtually became the definitive cheap car in the free world between 1950 and sometime in the 1970s, when the Japanese really conquered the market. Even after that, production persisted in many markets.

For good and bad, the New Beetle is merely a retro-riffic echo of that car, much like the new Mini. The bad part is that the New Beetle is not really cheap, and not nearly as influential as the original (VW sells far more Golfs and Jettas than they do Beetles; it’s just a fun image car and a few extra sales for them). The good part is that it’s a pretty good car, which the original Beetle never was.

According to the usually so-so Jalopnik This Honda UK ad won a Cannes ad award. It’s so happy!

I’m going to go hate something now.

I celebrated our nation’s birthday yesterday by pummeling myself in a bike race. To wit: the Yaletown Grand Prix. Results aren’t posted yet, but I didn’t finish in the money. But I still had a pretty good race. Suck level 3. Why so good? Well, with a big team in the Cat 4/5 race, we planned (and mostly did) slam breakaway after breakaway on the main pack. I went for an early flyer that stayed away for a couple of laps, making it easy for my surprisingly numerous fans to find me, since they kept announcing my name and number as a result.

I even had half a chance at a points-paying position in the end, but I was on the wrong side of a last-lap crash, and while I didn’t fall down, I came to a dead stop, and straggled across the line in a nothing position, somewhere in the top half of the field.

It felt good. Maybe my best race this year. Racing always hurts less when you get a result you like.

In other news, this morning there was a bike race in France you might have heard of. I’m not one for getting too caught up in the Lanceophilia that surrounds a certain 6-time winner and defending champion of the Tour de France, but in today’s opening time trial stage, Mr. Armstrong made a monstrous statement. He came second by two seconds to the winner (TT specialist Dave Zabriskie: he won’t be in the running when the race hits the mountains). But Lance, 2s behind Dave, was 51s ahead of third place man Alexandre Vinokourov, and in the most dramatic image of the day, caught and passed Jan Ullrich on the road. That means that Lance took over a minute out of his keenest rival on the first day of the Tour, and nearly a minute out of all of his serious rivals. To put that time gap in perspective, he has won the tour by less.

Lance Armstrong is ready for this race. It should be an interesting few weeks.

The next question is which stages really matter? Well, stay home on Tuesday, July 12, when the race has its first mountaintop finish. Sunday the 17th will be another epic mountain stage, and may be the decisive stage.

The two other days that really matter to the GC riders chasing after the yellow jersey are the team time trial on July 5, and the final time trial on July 23, the penultimate day of racing. But TTs are fairly dull to watch on TV, so just check your favourite news source for results.

This is a pro-quality race face. That’s from this year’s Belgian National Championships. Baguet (left) ends up winning a very close photo-finish.

Speaking of which, I haven’t blogged my glorious experience at the Norm Lowe Memorial Road Race this weekend, a serious piece of riding with a mean-spirited set of rolling hills in the course. For me, a victory consisted of making it home with the pack. Well, I made it to the last lap, when it all went crappy. I finished below my customary mid-pack level, though not by much (35/65 starters), and sucked wind in what was supposed to be an A race for me.

But I console myself with a tiny thought: I’m not built for the hills. The next race is not hilly, it’s a flat 30-minute criterium, the Yaletown Grand Prix. My bunch starts at 2:15 pm on Canada Day. I will do well here. Well, I’d better.

At least The Good Thing is, so far, so good. Pictures shortly.

So, The Lovely One and I were discussing the used New Beetle we will soon be acquiring, and we agreed on the perfect name for the new car: The Good Thing.

This is, of course, a very silly joke, and the usual prize (box of Timbits, to be delivered at my convenience within Greater Vancouver) will be awarded to the first respondent who can identify the reference.

You get two hints: I’m pretty sure Google will not help, and it’s not a Martha Stewart reference.

Answers to the usual place.

Wednesday evening I saw a lady about a car, and some hours later, have tentatively contracted to buy it on The Lovely One’s behalf.

So, the next time you see me, it should be rolling in The Lovely One’s pretty black 1998 Volkswagen New Beetle. That’s what VW calls them, leading to oxymoronic statements like “I just bought a used New Beetle.”

If you’re wondering, the upside of Beetles is that they’re incredibly cute, reasonably practical, very well appointed for a vehicle that is nominally at the low end of the car ladder, and they feel good, like tiny German cars. It feels like a substantial step up in amenities from my Tercel. The downside is that they’re ludicrously cute (when driving it, I will eternally look like a guy driving his wife’s car), the design basically sacrifices cargo space to cuteness (underneath, a Beetle is a Golf is a Jetta is an Audi A3; the difference is mostly bodywork), the sightlines are said to be less than ideal, and the reliability is merely average. It’s not really a sports car, though it seems to corner happily.

I am happy with the car we got, though. It has no major problems, unlike some of the things we saw. It’s not a VW Cabrio, which was the other car on our list (my objection? The Cabrio is up there with the best, but there’s no way to escape the fact that convertibles are structurally compromised cars, and that shows up in their ride and noise levels). But I keep thinking of the 1.8 Turbo one that got away before we could looka t it…

What would I have bought in this price range? BMW 535, or found a Lexus SC and bargained until the seller came down to my level. The SC300 and SC400 are very pretty, very luxurious coupes with reasonable performance built by Toyota. My experiences with the Tercel (now for sale, dontcha know, and I’ve just become a motivated seller…) has made me feel considerable goodwill towards its makers.